So I went into the Apple Store in Santa Monica, and was amazed to see it packed with so many people nearly ejaculating over the styley gear on offer. I made my way over to the till, and a pimply guy, early 20′s trying to look cool, stopped me. He held out his hand, palm facing me like a traffic cop, and said “Stop. Do you have an appointment?” I thought to myself, “what, an appointment to spend money?” I said, “No, I don’t have an appointment.” “What do you want, anyway?” he asked somewhat belligerently. I said “I wanted to buy an iPad or two”. He looked me in the eye, then looked down my body to my shoes, and up again. He paused. “I’m sorry, we’re all sold out.”

I nearly ran out of the store, wondering what on earth had ever possessed me to step inside an Apple store in the first place.

It’s nice to be back in Aotearoa, an iPad-free zone, for now.